Lyrics: You Are What You Is (in album Thing-fish)

ENSEMBLE: (displaying Dummy #1)
Do you know what you are?

THING-FISH:
Dat what I ast ya!

ENSEMBLE:
You are what you is You is what you am

THING-FISH:
And DAT de trufe!

ENSEMBLE:
(A cow don't make ham...)

THING-FISH:
I meant dat now!

ENSEMBLE:
You ain't what you're not

THING-FISH:
Not even hardly...

ENSEMBLE:
So see what you got

THING-FISH:
And you got a lot o' lookin' t'do, junior!

ENSEMBLE:
You are what you is

THING-FISH:
Dat entirely TOO CORRECT!

ENSEMBLE:
An' that's all it 'tis!

THING-FISH:
Uh-HUHHHH!

ENSEMBLE:
A foolish young man

THING-FISH:
Bring dat dummy ovuh heah 'n show it to 'em!

ENSEMBLE:
Stashed away in SAN QUENTIM Ate de mys'try potatoes

THING-FISH:
Told ya 'bout dem 'taters!

ENSEMBLE:
EVIL PRINCE was inventin' Now he talk like de THING-FISH

THING-FISH: (manipulating the dummy)
("Hmmmm, Saffiiiee!")

ENSEMBLE:
An' he look like a MAMMY!

THING-FISH: (manipulating the dummy)
("See de mammy, now! See de mammy, now!")

ENSEMBLE:
His fav'rit CO-LOG-NUMM...

THING-FISH:
Smell like...

SISTER POTATO HEAD BOBBY BROWN, SISTER GHENGHIS ADONIS
OSMOSIS, SISTER JASMINE NOXEMA TAPIOCA:
CHITLINS!

ENSEMBLE:
Is de one dey call 'SAMMY'!

THING-FISH:
One-Adam-Twelve...see de mammy...

ENSEMBLE:
He finally layin'

THING-FISH:
Armed 'n dangerous, reproach wit cautium!

ENSEMBLE:
De whole thang down, 'Cept de NIVEA LOTIUM!

THING-FISH:
Rub it on good, now!

ENSEMBLE:
An de ROYAL CROWN!

THING-FISH:
Take good care o' dat "ASH"!

ENSEMBLE:
Do you know what you are?

THING-FISH:
You's a wimp...she's a shrew!

ENSEMBLE:
You are what you is

THING-FISH:
Got dat?

ENSEMBLE:
You is what you am

THING-FISH:
One-Adam-Twelve, see de mammy agin'!

ENSEMBLE:
(A cow don't make ham...)

THING-FISH:
And it never will...

ENSEMBLE:
You ain't what you're not,

THING-FISH:
Unless SCIENCE do somethin' 'bout it!

ENSEMBLE:
So see what you got!

THING-FISH:
I KNOW dey woikin' on it...

ENSEMBLE:
You are what you is,

THING-FISH:
Underneath VIRGINIA!

ENSEMBLE:
An' that's all it 'tis!

THING-FISH:
BOOG-BOOGMMM, Dano..."MAMMY ONE"! They toss dummy #1 into the
wings, an d introduce dummy #2 to HARRY & RHONDA. Their torture-chairs,
(on a rolling platform), are wheeled to center stage. The action takes place
all around them.

ENSEMBLE: (showing Dummy #2)
A foolish young man
Of de negro persuasion
Devoted his life
To become a caucasian
He stopped eating pork
He stopped eating greens
He trade his dashiki

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON: (manipulating the dummy)
("Uhuru!")

ENSEMBLE:
For some Jordache Jeans!

He learned to play golf
An' he got a good score
Now he says to himself:
"I AIN'T NO..."

THING-FISH:
"NIGNINT!"

ENSEMBLE:
NO MORE...HEY! HEY! HEY!"

THING-FISH:
One-Adam-Twelve, see de "NIGNINT" wit knife... proceed wif cautium...knife
may be open...

ENSEMBLE:
BWANA MA-COO-BAH

HARRY:
All Right! Let's go!

ENSEMBLE:
MERCEDES BAINNNZZZZZ!

ENSEMBLE:
Who is who?

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON: (singing)
I don't know...

ENSEMBLE:
'N what is what

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
Somethin' I just don't know...

ENSEMBLE:
'N why is this

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
Tell me now...

ENSEMBLE:
Appropriot

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
That's a funny pronunciation, If'n ever I heard one!

ENSEMBLE:
If you don't like

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
Where'd you get that word?

ENSEMBLE:
What you has got

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
Appropriot? The word is not!

ENSEMBLE:
Drop it in the dirt

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
Drop it, yeah!

ENSEMBLE:
'N let it rot

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
I can smell it now!

ENSEMBLE:
Someone else

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
Here de come, here de come!

ENSEMBLE:
Will surely come

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
I told you he was comin'!

ENSEMBLE:
'N pick it up

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
That's right!

ENSEMBLE:
'Cause he wants some

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
An' he wants it for free!

ENSEMBLE:
And when one day

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
There will come a day!

ENSEMBLE:
You wonder who

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
I wonder too!

ENSEMBLE:
You used to was

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
Who I was, anyway!

ENSEMBLE:
'N what you do

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
I used to work at the post office!

ENSEMBLE:
You'll scratch your head

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
But I don't wanna un-do my doo!

ENSEMBLE:
'N look around

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
To see what's goin' on!

ENSEMBLE:
But what you lost

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
Can't seem to find it!

ENSEMBLE:
Will not be found

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
A Mercedes Benz!

ENSEMBLE:
Do you know what you are?

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
I know!

ENSEMBLE:
You are what you is

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
I'm the kinda guy...

ENSEMBLE:
You is what you am

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
That ought to be drivin'

ENSEMBLE:
A cow don't make ham

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
A four-fifty SLC...

ENSEMBLE:
You ain't what you're not

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
A big ol' RED ONE!

ENSEMBLE:
So see what you got

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
With some golf clubs stickin' out de trunk!

ENSEMBLE:
You are what you is

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
I'm gwine down to de links on Saturday mornin'!

ENSEMBLE:
An' that's all it is

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
Gimme a five dollar bill!

ENSEMBLE:
YOU ARE WHAT YOU IS

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
And an overcoat too...

ENSEMBLE:
AN' THAT'S ALL IT IS

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
Where's my waitress, yeahhhh!

ENSEMBLE:
YOU ARE WHAT YOU IS

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
Robbie, take me to Greek Town!

ENSEMBLE:
AN' THAT'S ALL IT IS

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
I'm harder than yer husband; Harder than yer husband!

ENSEMBLE:
YOU ARE WHAT YOU IS

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
I'm goin' down to White Street, to the Mudd Club, y'all!

ENSEMBLE:
AN' THAT'S ALL IT IS

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
I'm goin' down 'n work the wall! 'N work the floor

ENSEMBLE:
YOU ARE WHAT YOU IS

SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
'N work the pipe, 'N work the wall some more!

ENSEMBLE:
AN' THAT'S ALL IT IS